Stopped feeding 3 weeks ago, still leaking, and now there's a hard tender patch. How long until milk actually dries up?

So we're done. He's 11 months, I went back to work in July, feeds had drifted down to just bedtime and then he started refusing that one too and I thought fine, we'll call it. Last feed was 3 weeks ago on Sunday.

Except my body has NOT called it. I'm still leaking through pads at night. If I press I can get milk out, proper milk, not just a drop. And since yesterday there's a hard patch on the outside of my left breast about the size of a walnut that is sore to touch and slightly warm-ish?? I keep pressing it to check which is probably not helping.

Google says milk dries up in "a few days to a few weeks" which is useless because it's been three weeks. My mum says bind them tightly with a scarf. My sister says cabbage leaves. I don't know if I'm meant to express to relieve it or if that just tells my body to keep going. Also is it possible to get mastitis when you're NOT even feeding any more, because I had it at six weeks and I'm scared of that fever again.

Three weeks is nothing, sorry! Mine took closer to two months to stop leaking after my first, and I could still squeeze a drop out at nearly a year. Totally normal.

Do NOT bind. That's the one thing everyone's mum says and it's the thing that gives you a blocked duct. The walnut IS a blocked duct, by the sound of it. Feed-free fix that worked for me: warm shower, gentle stroke towards the nipple, hand express JUST enough to soften it, then cold on it afterwards. Not emptying, just taking the edge off.

Lurking because I'm a few weeks behind you (dropping feeds now). Following for the cabbage leaf verdict because my mother in law has literally bought a cabbage.

Becky, two separate answers here, and the second one matters more than the first.

On how long: the "few days to a few weeks" line is about the feeling of fullness settling, not about milk disappearing. After a gradual wean it is normal to leak a little for several weeks, to be able to express milk for a few months, and to get the odd drop for many months after that, sometimes a year or more. Three weeks in, still leaking at night, is exactly what most of us had. Production winds down on the same supply and demand principle that built it: the less milk is removed, the less is made. It just does not switch off like a tap, and there is no medicine or trick that speeds it up that I would put in writing here.

On the walnut: that is the thing to take seriously. A hard, tender, warm patch during weaning is the classic blocked duct, and yes, you absolutely can get mastitis when you are no longer feeding, because the risk was never about the baby, it was about milk sitting in a bit of breast that is not draining. Weaning is one of the most common times for it, especially when the last feed ends abruptly, as yours did. Gemma's routine is the right one: warmth, gentle stroking towards the nipple, hand express or pump just enough that the patch softens, then cold. The trick is the word "enough". Removing a little relieves the duct without telling your body to keep production up; emptying the whole breast does the opposite. The site's guide to blocked milk ducts walks through it step by step, and the stopping breastfeeding piece has the section on keeping comfortable while your body catches up.

When I weaned my second, I dropped the last two feeds in the same week because life got in the way, and got a tender patch exactly like yours. Because of my own mastitis history I was watching it like a hawk, and it went in two days with the warm-then-cold routine. The line I held, and would hold for you: if you get a fever, flu-like aching, a spreading red area, or you just feel unwell, that is a same-day call to your doctor rather than another night of pressing it. Mastitis needs looking at if it has not settled within 24 hours, and you already know what that fever feels like.

Cabbage leaves: cold, and they fit in a bra, so they do a job as a cold compress. There is no strong evidence the cabbage itself is doing anything a cold flannel would not. Use whichever you have. No binding, no scarves, no tight sports bra either.

beckyt84 said:

I keep pressing it to check which is probably not helping

It is not helping, I did the same. Every time I pressed it to see if it had gone it hurt more, which I took as it getting worse, which made me press it more. Stop poking it for 12 hours and then check once.

Update because I hate threads that just stop. Warm shower, stroked it, hand expressed about a tablespoon (that was weirdly hard to make myself do after three weeks of trying NOT to), frozen peas in a bra for the evening. Next morning it was smaller, gone by the second day. No fever, thank god.

Still leaking a bit at night. Have stopped googling it. Told my mum the scarf thing is banned and my sister has her cabbage back.